Posts by John Burlison

Brother, How Are You?

Brother, How Are You?
The most difficult question for me to answer on Sundays is, “How are you?” I get that question at church six or eight times every week, and I never quite know how to answer. I usually mumble “Oh, pretty good,” or something in a similar vein. But the real answer is that I often feel isolated, alone, confused. I also fe [...]

A Prediction and a Prayer

5356662124_65d05aed99_b
A friend at church asked me what was my opinion about the long-term outlook for LGBTQ members, and what did I think I could realistically hope for. I want to examine her query in this post. My short answer is this: I think ultimately that the current teachings and policies of the LDS church about homosexuality and transgender identity, and t [...]

You started me back on the way to chu...

4625408407_4d1b35cf77_o
Yesterday, (Sunday, November 8) I did not want to go to church and feel in my bones that I’m a gay man living in apostasy. I love my church family, and I felt the weight of my separation from them as I prepared for the day. My friend, S., wrote me an email inquiring about how life was going for me. S. is a former church member who fina [...]

Mormon Mahout

4715270852_ce24d51fd5_b
The events within the LDS church of the last couple of months have caused me to examine more closely my relationship with the church. I have my doubts. I’ve always had my doubts. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t doubt. Early on, I was encouraged to fast and pray about my doubts, which I did religiously, but I’ve [...]

The Farmer and Me

Twenty years ago, I was feeling alienated from my family, some of the people I love the very most, and the fault was entirely mine. I was attending my brother’s wedding in Jackson Hole, Wyoming, and I was not happy. My family loved me and accepted me, but I felt awkward. I carried my gay chip on my shoulder at this most heterosexual of [...]

Shambling Toward Zion

10884698_10204944564641262_1403674294_n
  I find myself drawing closer to the LDS church, and I wonder if I need to give it a closer look. I was a member decades ago and was excommunicated for apostasy. I returned to fellowship about three years ago, but have not taken any steps to return to membership partly because my husband and I are in a marriage that the LDS church does [...]

Subscribe to Exploring Sainthood!

Archives